Do you really believe?
Dear ma,
When you say that I’ll one day be
the greatest there is, do you really believe it? Does it come from your heart
when you say that you have faith enough in my ability? Ma, when I kicked in
your stomach, was it the kick of a hero or one weak and feeble? Did I have the
instincts and urge to live or was I sickly and wishing for death? Ma, when I
spell my crazy dreams and ambitions unto you, and you smile in all your
transcendence, do you really believe or you are just trying not to bruise my
heart? When I look up at you and you turn your eyes into the horizon, when you
call me out to see the stars, when you tell me that I can reach out for the
moon, do you really believe it or you just say it to get my hopes up?
Dear Ma, I am trying, God knows I
am. Even though I am so far away from you, I can still feel you nudging me and
telling me to go for it. I can see your cheap, bleached dress flapping in the
wind as you go about your chores. I can still hear you whispering in my ear
every time I want to give up. Dear ma, I am working overtime to make sure I
live to become the man you always wanted. I am learning to grow into that boy you
have always seen in your dreams. I know you have always wanted the best for me
but Ma, I wanna ask, do you really believe? Do you really believe in all you
say about me? Do you really believe that I can concur my fears and walk past
the boundaries ‘they’ have set for me? Do you really
believe that your son would be the salvation that many so direly seek? Ma, I
don’t doubt what you say about me. I just want you to convince me again and
again that I can climb the mountain and walk the seas.
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