Open scars in the place of open arms, thou art
suffocating me. Let go of the rope and reduce the weight of the guillotine. I
would blame you for everything but who should we kid? I am the one who let go
first, and found you drowning when I came back to save you. I was the first to
throw the stone and the harsh words. I would say I am broken but you are
shattered. I would say I am bruised but you sure are disintegrating. I am a prisoner,
but who is my jailer, guilt or jealousy? If I had said yes when I should, would
we have drifted away like an unanchored raft in open waters? If only you had
told me that all I had to do was ask, then maybe I wouldn’t have waited till my
feelings were stale. I would have held on longer, if you never called me your
friend. I would have been there every day if you never said I was like a big
brother to you. I am trying to write you this but my lonely tears just don’t
seem to understand. I would have fought for you, but I, your friend would have
been left sinking in the swamp when Romeo came with his horse. Look deep in my
eyes and read the pain. Do you know what it means to love in silence and fear?
Do you know the pain of nursing a heart that you never broke in the first
place? I would have given anything for you, but you were to leave, to fly away
as soon as your wings grew. If I loved you too much, tell me who would love my
Juliet when she came? I am sorry friend, but I got tired of holding on to vain hope.
I got tired of tears every night and forced smiles when you handed me to the
broken heart bit by bit. Though we are broken, I know Romeo shall turn the
corners soon and off to the castle you’ll be. I don’t want to cry when you are
gone. Let me go to the grass first, and seek me one of my own, so when you
gallop off I shall not run after you shedding rivers and streams. I have had to
learn, that though I loved you much, I wasn’t supposed to forget myself. I have
had to see, that I had leaned so heavily on a thin sapling, one that would have
broken and let me dash my head against stones. I hope you understand that I had
to walk away not because love had run out, simply because the path got too
rough and the burden too heavy.
I dreamed a dream I dreamed a dream, some night when I was asleep, of castles of gold and towers of bronze. I saw trees that never lost their fruit and hills whose ice never yielded to the heat. I dreamed of a sun that never went down and playtime that never came to an end, stories that did not stop flowing. When I woke up, I found myself in my tower of desolation, with crumbling walls and a disintegrated future. Outside the window I saw trees rendered barren by the overnight storm and hills stripped bare by the merciless sun. When I was young I dreamed a dream that I would never die, but that was before my nightmares grew teeth and started biting. I knew of the tree of love that grew at the centre of the universe but that was before my heart was shattered and blown away a million times. When I was young, I wished to live forever but now, caskets conjure my demons and funeral wails raise my hair. I had a dream, oh I had one, but when I started growing up, and begun seeing the differe...
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